“The beautiful spring came and when nature resumes her loveliness, the human soul is apt to revive also.” Harriet Ann Jacobs
I always love the springtime. It represents new beginnings. Growth and discovery. It has been over a month since I last wrote an entry. I was dealing with so much sadness after losing our beloved dog, Robson that I had nothing to say. And then came the hint of spring. A lot of things had been sitting stagnant within me. It is an uncomfortable state for me to sit with that. I am used to always being on the go and this past year had certainly changed that for most people. Today, I feel inspired to write of things that I am optimistic about and the feelings of hope stirring within me.
The first and foremost thing that has rustled me out of my sadness, has been finding a new puppy to put some energy into. A week after losing Robson, I realized that I needed a dog in my house. My husband and I do not have children so all of that parental energy went into our dog. The house seemed so quiet and not right with all of that silence. I started looking for a rescue dog and was having a really hard time finding one. Apparently, finding a dog in a pandemic is like getting tickets to the best show on Ticketmaster. I ended up chatting with a lovely lady on one of the rescue sites who gave me tips and tricks to get one. Low and behold, a sweet energetic 8 week puppy came across my screen. He had the sweetest eyes and I knew Robson would want for us to give another dog a good life. Down to Calgary we went to meet the new potential candidate. We had all of these regal names picked out. Gatsby was my favorite. When we met the pup though, that was not his vibe. We ended up naming him Dax. He is silly, energetic and sweet. Just perfect for us.
I was feeling before we lost Robson, that my life had become so boring. Dax is the perfect cure for that. He makes me busy and having no time to feel bored. Three walks a day and so much to teach him. Life is busy and noisy now and I absolutely love it. I found a local artist who painted a picture for me of Robson. It is beautiful and I will look at it always with such love. Now to pour my energy into our new pup.
Spring also formally arrived yesterday. It always makes me think of things to look forward to. I took a workshop early this week on resilience. It was a perfect topic to get focused on things I have dealt with recently and feel proud and strong to have passed through them and have come out the other side. My mom had her first Covid vaccine today and I can get mine at the end of next month. Makes me feel optimistic that I can see my people in the not too distant future. This summer could actually be a time to have get togethers with my family at least. I found an acupuncturist who has been a saving grace. I could barely walk at all a few weeks ago and my neurologist scheduled an MRI for me in May to see what is going on. I ended up being recommended to go to an acupuncturist who after 3 sessions has me pretty much pain-free when moving around. I’m so grateful for finding him. It was hard to feel hopeful when you are in constant pain.
Also happy to report that I have started art journaling again. I even had some prints made up and I am going to hang them in my house. In terms of health, I am looking at buying the Alinker walking bike that I have been looking at for a couple of years. Hopeful to be able to use it to get back some strength in my legs. So many things on the horizon to loo forward to. It is mine and my husband’s 10th anniversary this fall. Starting to think there might even be a possibility to drive across Canada in September to celebrate it.
I am also a big gardener. Just being able to see the soil that was under the snow is making me happy. Looking at my garden diagram and purchasing seeds and bulbs has me looking forward rather than backwards for good memories. I feel like I can create more memories in the future. A bit of warm weather, a crazy puppy and the possibility of a return to a more normal life is all it took to get it out of my sad rut. Although I still have many limitations on me due to my health, I am able to see now how I can move on and have the resilience I need to move forward.
Hoping you can find some buds of hope and optimism this spring.